A work in progress.
June 2011
You see, it's never bad enough to just leave or give up. But it's never good enough to feel right.
I gotta leave you alone.
Been up for like an hour now. Sooooo early. I guess at 8 I’ll start getting ready for the day…and doing some last minute cleaning.
I’m pretty sure I’m becoming paranoid. Ugh, I hate when Bri’s right. lol
I really wish I hadn’t left my eyeshadow and fake-up remover in Americus =[
I’m in a much better mood this morning, which is always a plus.
I think Sherry just paid me early…niiiiiiice.
Alright,I guess I should really get ready….
Hope everyone has a good day :))
xx
844. SOMETIMES THE SPARK JUST ISN'T THERE EVEN WHEN YOU'RE EXPECTING A LIGHTING STORM. DON'T FORCE IT.
What makes you think you're worth the wait?
I don’t even know what I’m feeling right now. (Although, I am feeling, so I guess it’s good to know I actually have some…lol jk) Everything’s a jumble in my head; everything’s a mess.
I wonder where I’ll be in a couple of years…or, hell, just this time next year. I wonder who will still be around. The people in my life are..the best. Even when they annoy the hell out of me (or vice versa, really, because I know I’m pretty damn ridiculous). Sometimes, I feel like there’s no one who really knows me very well and at other times I feel like I’m just..the easiest person to read and my people know me better than I know myself.
I also wonder why I’m so scared. I mean, there are the obvious reasons but… Still. I hate placing blame on others for how I am.
I am really trying to work on not hating myself. And I haven’t felt like this in a while, but normally, after however long of being good, and making progress, there are always nights like this when I’m alone..well, I don’t even have to be alone… but, when everything just hits me. Like everything’s crashing down. It never lasts for long; I’ll be over this by tomorrow; but for right now…
Anyways… I don’t really know where I’m going with this.
Sweet dreams.
xx
all around the world statues crumble for me: My pride is the one to blame. →
betaaquarii.tumblr.com
Soooooo. Tomorrow some people are coming to look at the house. I really wish someone would just buy it already. (Even though I really hate moving…)
I’m supposed to meet up with Molls at Blackbird tomorrow. I’m excited; we have lots to talk about.
Annnnnd Friday I’m hanging…
omg. we totally need a little mini trip. i’ll be getting paid like…the last week or the second to last week in july…so a pre-going back to school trip would be AWESOME
My pride is the one to blame.
Soooooo. Tomorrow some people are coming to look at the house. I really wish someone would just buy it already. (Even though I really hate moving…)
I’m supposed to meet up with Molls at Blackbird tomorrow. I’m excited; we have lots to talk about.
Annnnnd Friday I’m hanging with Bri and Michael and all of our worries are going to disappear…..or be enhanced. lol Again, apologies in advance for any phone calls I may make.
I really feel like going someplace far, far away. Pronto.
xx
I must admit it's been fun, but that's no reason to jump the gun. If this is real, time will tell so let me bite my tongue and remind myself...
Michael is asking me to go to Kaos but… I’m really broke AND I’m really not a club kind of girl. It would probably be a lot of fun and I’ve never been to a gay club before… So I guess we’ll see.
I wish my phone would hurry up and get here. Although, I hear it’s in pieces and I have to put it together…ha…ha… We’ll see how that goes. lol
I need some inspiration. Not sure why; it should be obvious enough, but I just can’t force myself right now, for some reason. It’s always hard to start once you’ve stopped.
I need a spa day.
I think I left my fake up remover and eyeshadow in Americus. And my toothbrush, but I’ve already fixed that problem. Ugggggggh.
Ok. I guess I’m going to try to be productive…
xx
